Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Why We Need The Zompocalypse

I think I had an epiphany, assuming I'm using the word correctly. We hope for the zompocalypse because life sucks. Nobody probably realizes just how much, but I think that's the underlying issue.

We spend 12-16 years in school, spend 40+ years working with typically only 1-2 weeks off a year, spend our lives acquiring material things, try to live according to the standards society sets for us. We do all of that for what? How much in your life is actually worth doing? Why do we spend so much time doing things we don't want to do, working a job that sucks(in most cases anyways)...well, actually I think that's the root of it. Work.

Modern day jobs suck the life out of every one of us. You work 8 hours a day(and up to an extra 2 hours for driving. Yay traffic!). Go home. Watch TV. Sleep. Repeat. It's what you spent 12 years in school and up to 4 more in college to do. Congrats! You are now living the life society says you should. For that, you get 2 days out of the week(or less, depending on how crap of a job you have) to do what you want, assuming you can afford it after paying the bills. But that's not all! You'll even get 1 to 2 weeks a year off, with pay! That's right! Work 52 weeks a year and get up to 2 of them off! You finally have time to take care of those chores you needed to get done all year long. Yay!

Why do we go to work everyday? Well, I needed that 50" TV, every season of every popular tv show on dvd, matching couch and love-seat, expensive dining room table set, brand new car, car stereo system with so much bass that if I turned it up it would break the windows in the car, shiny rims that make me feel good about myself, my overpriced clothing that makes me look like a douche so I can feel good about myself when I'm not in my car, my cell phone and overpriced wireless plan, my super awesome computer, video games to keep me entertained, etc, etc, etc. Yeah. That's if you're job affords you that, otherwise you work simply to survive and pay your rent...and hopefully on time this month.

Society has us locked in though. There is no way out. If you want to survive, have a place to live, eat, etc, you have to work. We were never raised or trained to be self-sufficient. We don't know how to grow or hunt our own food when we need it, to survive on our own without money. It's the only thing we know, work for money, spend money for the things we need. We are not free, that part is the illusion society would have us believe.

And that is just work. Do I even really need to get into everything else? Waiting longer to get through a checkout line then the time you spent shopping. All the people that will take advantage of your good will(assuming you have any left). Countless hours spent sitting in traffic and dealing with people that can't drive. No? Good.

You know what would fix all of that? The zompocalypse. No more standards of living. No more material things(except guns and ammo and barricades). No more going to work every day to pay for things you don't need. Freedom. That's what the zompocalypse brings. That's why we all dream of it happening.

To quote Dr. Horrible, "And by the way it's not about making money, it's about taking money. Destroying the status quo because the status is not quo.". I think the movie Fight Club has the right idea.

Go to work, send your kids to school, follow fashion, act normal, walk on the pavement, watch TV, save for your old age, obey the law. Repeat after me: I am free


  1. omg i need that gun in the fist pic. beyond everyhting else

  2. ya but u forgot how much fucking fun it would b

  3. Society makes us vacuous and teaches us to fill the hole with material stuff. Like trained monkeys we do as we're told because we are in captivity and have been trained well. It is a Pavlovian response to collect material stuff but what we really crave is to feel alive; that's our reward: we feel alive when we acquire stuff. You're right though, what we call living is actually being the zombie - your apocalypse is already here my friend and there is no bigger herd of undead than us.

  4. I don't always know exactly why, all I know is I'm right. Thank you buckaroopopcorn for providing better insight as to why then I am capable of.

  5. Going to have to put one of these in my house. Everyday that goes by I hope is another day closer to the Zombie Apocalypse. I've been working on my cardio, personally.